poetry

The best thing

The best thing to do at this moment
Is to place one word after another
Bead them together
Wishing it’d make us feel better
When it’s done
As if these words give birth
A new lease of life

The best thing to do at this moment
Is to let you go
So you may one day find your
Way back to me

The best thing to do at this moment
Is choose my words
Intricately like picking beads of different
Sizes and colours
To weave a necklace
As if the necklace either adds to my life
Or just chokes me to death

The best thing to do at this moment
Is to let you go
So you may one day find your
Way back to me

The best thing to do at this moment
Is to hope that you really buy
These words
That stem like mini explosives from the
Root of my throat
As a parting gift.
Hoping this is not a goodbye
At least not yet.

The best thing to do at this moment
Is to let you go
So you may one day find your
Way back to me

poetry

And now

And now the tears are dried up

But the empty feeling never fades

When I look out of the window

On a fairly cold night like this

In a stranger city

I can picture you beside me

Sleeping, screaming on the phone

Reading and watching videos

I found solace in your presence

Like a child next to a busy parent

And now I feel so alone

Taken out of my home

You make it look so easy

Living without me

But I die a million times inside

With a million memories

Of you and me

Inside your car

Where I looked at you

And you looked at everything else

poetry

How many more?

How many times do you run

Back and forth

In my thoughts

How many times do I

Pick up the phone for you

How many times do tears

Trickle down like raindrops

In the night

When it’s dark

How many times will I have

To stand at the door

Before I shut it down for eternity

I watch you from the door

How many times do I want to

Run to you

Ask you why

And I can’t

Feels like there’s worlds between

You and me

Mine is in shambles

Yours were built in a day

How many times I replace you with faces

Just to see you when I close my eyes

And only God knows

How many nights like these

I will sit in the center of my house

On the floor

And weep for you

poetry

Curse

And it is a curse,

That I still hear your voice in my head

Every night

As I lay on my bed

Counting sheep beneath the stars

I hear you whisper

I escape

 

Running every mile

To get away from you

The closer it gets me to your door

An unlikely thief

Making no mischief

I wander into your home

Turning lights on and back off

Music in your bedroom,

Unique symphony of the sitar

You are asleep

And I sit next to you

You, my sleeping soulmate

“Wake up now”, my lips whisper to yours

You twitch, you move

“Come to me”, you utter in your sleep

Pull me close

And I sleep peacefully in your hold

When I wake up

You are gone and

I am alone again

 

And it is a curse,

I still hear your voice in my head

Every morning

As I lay on my bed

Only the sheep are missing

And stars invisible

It was all another dream

Again today, you don’t come back

And I don’t move forward

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

poetry

Heartbreak 

Heartbreak is a 04:00PM sun

It smacks you right in the face

Every time you get back up

It’s when you find his picture with her

And your strength leaves you

Faster than the speed of light

Burning your face through the window

It’s when you pretend to hold yourself together

But your lips tremble

And tears trickle down

Heartbreak is when you taste a nightmare

When your  eyes are open

And you can’t wake yourself up

Because you are already awake

You want to sleep and never wake up

Till the time rights itself

Wake up with no memory

Of their treacherous promises

Heartbreak is when you are so empty

That every breath feels like waste of air

And you wonder why

It still hurts like it was yesterday

It’s when you ask yourself

How much longer are we going to cry

And a voice inside you says maybe forever

poetry

Not Yet and No Longer

Oh how am I scared

To let go

Of myself

A part of me, attached to you

How I unintentionally and

Desperately hold on to you

But you are gone

There’s a wall

Made of glass

But all you see is a mirror

 

I cry out to you

In my sleep

“Come back”, I plead

My knees bleed

“Don’t go?” I say

Knowing it’s too late

Closed is the gate

Locked in the door

I can’t get to you

Not anymore

 

And I still sit waiting

In front of the glass

Hoping for nothing

Wishing for nothing

Pain is a friend now

The only companion

The glass now plays memories

Anniversaries, those idiosyncrasies

But the film is blurry

Or maybe it’s my sight

 

My people try

Dragging me away

But my heels are dug deep

In this space

Between not yet

And no longer

They hold my hands

And pull me away some days

Other days they just let me be

 

My body runs away

Only to find that sometimes

My heart is left behind

Sometimes it’s my soul

My body is weary and

We all play the waiting game

Till I get myself out of the space

Between not yet and no longer

poetry

He couldn’t tell her

He couldn’t tell her,

That he kept scrolling down her pictures

When everyone was asleep,

As tears rolled down his cheek

When she smiled,

How it was strong enough

To change landscapes

How she deserved the world and

She was incredibly naive

To love someone like him

 

He couldn’t tell her

How he wished to hold her hand

And pull her into a tight hug,

That she’d struggle to escape.

How he wanted to trace the length

Of the city on her back,

All the way down

Till her breathing slowed,

And her pulsating heart

Made him feel alive.

 

He couldn’t tell her

How he remembered every microscopic detail

Of their lives together,

How he was still with her in the

Parallel universe,

And how he’d still hear her voice

Find her face in the crowd;

Her anxious eyes would still

Look out for him,

How she’d wade through all beautiful faces

To run into him

Oh! How he wished he was brave

Like her.

 

But it was too late,

He wished her away.

He couldn’t tell her,

How much he wanted her to stay